things I want to do before I die (or get married)

I've spent alot of time this week thinking about my future. Have you ever spend time to thinking about your future? Beyond things like what you're gonna eat in an hour, or what bar you want to get kick out of that weekend. No, I'm talking about the future-future. Like flying cars future. It can get kind of intimidating. 

For me, some of it can often lead to intense feelings of anxiousness. 

What do I think about? Well I think about things like if I'll ever go back to school, what I'm going to do for a career. You know that, 'where is my life heading' shit.  

That being said, others make me really excited. For example, the other day I'm sitting in the shower and started thinking about things I wanted to accomplish (outside of cleaning the stench off my balls). 

I decided to make my top 10 bucket list, only  instead of it being shit I want to do before I kick the bucket, it's going to be things I want to do before I get married (because that is really when a man dies).

• I want to go to Vegas with my buddies. I'm fairly afraid of what goes on in Vegas. I have big love for gambling, women and booze and I hear all three can be had at extreme excess there. This is not a formula for living the decent life.  When I go there, I don't want to talk to a single girl that I knew before the trip. I want to gamble away enough money to buy a new tv, maybe make fun of some transvestite hookers, or trash a nice hotel room. Most importantly I don't want to remember a f***ing moment of it.
• I want to see a Baseball game in every stadium. Eh, I take that back. I want to see one in the big time stadiums. I want to see a game at Wrigley, The New Busch and Fenway. A year ago I would've said Yankee Stadium, but the closed that one and that new stadium is a colossal waste of space.
• I want a three some where atleast one of the members is one of the following: Jessica Alba, Eva Mendez, Scarlett Johanasson, Hayden Panettiere, Megan Fox, Elisha Cuthbert, maybe 5 chicks that work at Buffalo Wild Wings, Mila Kunis or 'Trouble' the playful dancer from the Acrop.
• I want season tickets to either the Blazers, Mariners or Seahawks. Preferably all three.
• I want to wake up in a Mexican Jail. Now I'm not saying I want to get raped or anything, but it would just be an awesome story to tell when I'm 45 and depressed and I'm hosting a bbq with my wife for our puesdo friends. Then I'll shed a tear, and flip the burgers before they get burnt.
• I want to have my own sketch comedy show, that becomes popular for my use of vulgar language and my love for offensive jokes. This would ultimately result in me actually feeling satisfied with my career, getting lots of money, and receiving morally questionable propositions from morally questionable women.
• I want to put Michael Vick up against his brother, Marcus in cage match to the death. There is only room for one shit head named Vick in this country, lets see who wants it more. Two physically superior athletes going at it inside a steel cage with their lives and their ability to be shit heads on the line. NOW THAT IS ENTERTAINMENT! Now I know what you're thinking, "but Belvin, they're brothers!? No way one would be able to kill the other." My solution: take a page out of Michaels playbook, electrocute the shit out of them if they aren't willing to get it on. Treat them like Pitbulls who refuse to participate in dog fights. It's so simple. (let it be known that the point of the whole paragraph is not because I was disgusted beyond belief with his actions. I do find them to be wrong but whatever, he does what he does. I just want him to feel my pain for having to HEAR about his actions for like two freaking years. It got to the point that I was having fantasies about BEING Helen Keller.)
  
• I want to record a rap album.
• I want to get paid to talk about sports.
• I want to go to Vegas, again. Are you kidding!?! Everything is better in Vegas, and with the buddies I have no freaking way one trip is going to satisfy the party monster. If you don't think Vegas deserves two trips then you've obviously never drank with the Born Winner or Lampstack. It's truly legendary.

Now some of these goals are simple, others a little more grandiose. Never the less each of these need to be obtained (ok, maybe the rap album is a little far fetched). The whole point of this was think about fun stuff, I'm tired of stressing about the future.

I don't need that right now. I'm 23, and I'm awesome. There will be plenty of time to be sad when I'm flipping burgers.